So some of the younger readers likely won’t relate to this, but you never know.
I don’t think that doing something stupid and putting yourself into a compromising situation that puts you in danger is something restricted to one generation over another. It is more a matter of the era what those “dangers” or “compromising situations” might be.
For me it was PCP, aka angel dust (more ironic that I could have ever imagined at the time) and blotter acid.
It was 1980, I had just turned 19. I was at a HUGE pasture party in eastern Colorado attented by peers and local adults alike. It had gotten late into the evening and I had been drinking and partaking of a hit off a joint here and there. I was pretty intoxicated and way the hell out in the country without a plan for how I was going get home. (Enter the first “stupid” part of of the story.)
I don’t remember who it was but at some point I was offered a joint and convinced that taking a quarter hit of blotter acid would “blow my mind”. With inhibitions down due to hours of drinking, I agreed it would be a “great” idea. (Second stupid part of the story.)
It was very shortly after, I decided to leave the party and start my 40 plus mile journey home through “the grid” as we referred to the grid pattern of county roads in the county, to Interstate 70 east of Denver to my parents house in Thornton, a northeastern suburb. It was after midnight but the party was still going strong.
It wasn’t long that I was on the road that the effects of something in the pot and/or the acid started to take effect. I was NOT doing well. I started to shake uncontrollably. My heart was racing. I wasn’t not visually processing the road at a level that made it safe to drive. Severe paranoia set in.
I was in a little Vega that wasn’t conducive to pulling over to sleep it off.I stopped at the houses of several friends who lived along the way home to find out if I could park myself on a floor or a couch until the effects wore off but found them either not home or otherwise engaged.
Finally, as a last resort before starting down a fairly unpopulated stretch of the interstate, I exited to a location where there was a trailer park. In that trailer park was the home of three male acqaintances that I knew of through mutual friends. I didn’t know them well but had attended parties at their trailer before. But I was desperate for a place to sit, lay my head and let the effects of whatever was going on with me to subside. I was, in short, a wreck.
One of the three answered the door, listened to my story and was very friendly and nice. “Sure, sure sure! Absolutely.” Or something to the effect. I remember he made a big deal about giving me his bed and he would sleep on the sofa. I was SOOOOOOO grateful. I was still over 30 miles from home and didn’t feel like I had total control of my limbs, mind or eyes.
I didn’t undress. I just fell onto the bed and was almost immediately out. I am not sure how much time had passed but I woke up to this jackass lying on top of my trying to undress me. I don’t really remember any details other than they were working on the inside of the trailer and the door to the bedroom was leaned up against the wall rather than being attached at the hinges. I remember getting out from under him and running for the doorway and shoving the door on top of him. I am tall. 5’9′”. I probably weighed about 125 at the time. He was a short guy, construction worker type. I am not sure how it happened but I remember him being under the door and me stomping on top of the door a couple of times because I was pissed.
It gave me enough time to get out the door and into my car and drive way. The entrance ramp to the highway wasn’t far away. Less than a mile. It wasn’t long after I was on the interstate that the shock set in.
Shock. Drugs. Alcohol. I was literally a recipe for disaster.
I was shaking, I mean REALLY shaking, all over. I needed to pull over but I had so little control over my legs I wasn’t confortable lifting my leg off the gas to put it on the brake. I didn’t know if I would be able to control how hard I braked. And I knew I was speeding. I couldn’t control how hard I was pressing the gas pedal. I have very vivid memories of this. I was more scared than I have ever been in my entire life.
I remember leaning forward and looking up at the sky thru the windshield. This was before Denver had gotten very big and there wasn’t a lot of ambient light to mess with the stars. And the sky was FULL of them.
NOTE: I do NOT recommend the following to anyone. Just saying.
I am telling you I was so terrified. I needed to do SOMETHING. I was terrified I was going to wreck or run into someone. I didn’t even trust myself enough to take my foot of the gas to slow down and steer to the side of the road.
This is what I came up with, crazy as it is.
I leaned forward and again looked up through the windshield and said “You have to do this. I can’t. ” And I leaned back and took my hands off the wheel.
Thankfully I-70 there is pretty much a straight shot. And it was very early in the morning so there weren’t alot of cars on the road.
But what happened next stuns me to this day. This day just short of 40 years later.
The effects of ALL drugs and alcohol spontaneously left my body. Completely. I was immediately completely sober.
I remember feeling kind of a “whoosh” and then being stunned really. I leaned forward and looked again through the windshield and was emotionally overwhelmed. I knew I was going to be OK. All I could do was weep and say over and over “Thank you. Thank you. Oh my God, Thank you.”
I had over 25 miles to go to think about what had just happened. To process. Walking to the door of my parents house and letting myself in. Going to bed. And lying there in awe and gratitude not really understanding what had jsut happened but so grateful that it did.
THAT was my first experience with the SuperConscious Mind and introduction to my knowingness that we are never alone.
This event really shaped much of the rest of my life. It became the first of many crazy stories that I will share over time. None as dramatic, thankfully, but still miraculous and indicative that the Source that created us all is real, is listening for our requests and responds in accordance with our clarity, belief and faith.